Saturday, June 27, 2009

Its a Nice Day for a White Wedding..

I went to Val and Greg's wedding tonight at Union Station. Normally I'm not a wedding kind of guy. When you are single any shred of self preservation gets thrown out the window. Finally gaining acceptance for being single? Not anymore at these shingdings. Its all will the married people come to the dance floor and chicken dances.

Normally I do the quick meet and greet " Oh congrats to you!" ( to the groom) "You look wonderful! Thanks for inviting me!" (To the bride) and if the parents are there then standing in front of them making awkward conversation "Yes Ms. Mcpinerkinckle that was me who encouraged your daughter to throw water ballons out of the car at the officer" and then I drop my gift eat a handful of dinnermints and peanuts, graze by the mormon red death and then book it to my car.

Not at this wedding.

Oh no. We danced so hard I think I lost three pounds in sweat weight.

Since I am talking about weddings I must give thanks to the Momma who taught me three essential aspects of wedding receptions.

Dances that you must know:
1. The electric slide
2. Boot Scooting Boogey
3. The Hustle (Cause you never know and its always good to have a backup).

Always wear a white shirt so the sweat doesn't show.

Depends if its sheet or homemade. If it looks like a bargin basement special at Walmart then move on.

Thus these skills saved me tonight from essential boredom.


  1. Blake, I just love your humor. I had a few moments today, so I got caught up a little on your happenings. Happy Birthday, good work on the gym membership, sweet bungalow, and life in general! Also.... I will keep these wedding tips in mind for all future affairs! Are you coming up to Kellie's wedding? At least their won't be mints and nut cups!

  2. What is mormon red death? I need to know.

  3. Ha ha oh my dear friend, how you make me laugh. I love you!! Thats how eventually I want my reception to be though, just a huge party. I am not a formal person so bring on the party!!!