Thursday, December 29, 2011

2012 End of the World

Stupid people hurt me.

By stupid I mean let's make rather sexist remarks to the token male of the mammography department. As a breast cancer warrior (my bosses words not mine) I can proudly say affirmative action worked for me!

So for today I have three lovely contestants who deserve to the "I is Smart Crown". (Patent pending)

Contestant One shared these lovely jewels of wisdom:

You are so lucky you never have to get a mammogram. This is so unfair for women, its painful, sexist, blah blah blah...

What I wanted to say was Well sweetheart when I turn 50 I get to have two fingers inserted in rear end and have a doctor dig for gold for 25 minutes looking for my prostate. So tell me which one would you prefer?

What I said was: Well that's your choice would still like to have the exam? Okay? Thank you feel free to take a seat and somebody will be right with you.

Contestant Two had this to offer to the table.

Bet you enjoy this you perverted man you..

What I wanted to say was "Look lady I'm doing this for the money. Its easier than standing on street corners hustling deals."

What I said was "Thank you! Have a nice day!"

Contestant Three shared their genetic talents with this pearl of wisdom:

You men have it so much easier the compression is so hard and you just mock us about getting our yearly screening and I'm so upset about my insurance not paying (which they do by the way its billed under preventive 100% free. Promise.) and its just our lot in life us women put up with so much more than men.

She kept on going but I kinda tuned her out.

What I wanted to say was "Well when I was a woman I didn't think they were too awful". But I could just see the face. However I restrained myself.

What I said was " Feel free to take a seat".

I'm so rotting in hell.

So who should win the crown?


  1. Ha ha ha, I loved the "Well when I was a woman..." Seriously though, what is wrong with people? Did someone really call you a perverted man? You should have been like, "Don't worry, I've seen better." Ugh, the nerve!

  2. OH Blake. Those are too funny! Just to reassure you, Pharmacy isn't much better :) Working with anyone in the public especially when it has to do with health just BLOWS! Period! :) I like the perverted man joke. I wonder if the girl behind the desk scheduling prostate exams gets ridiculed. Probably not!