Blake est embarrassé.

I find myself stuck in the same routine.

Wake up at 4:50 am, turn on the light check my social media (Cause people gots to know) and then stumble into my kitchen take my pills, and stagger into the shower. At promptly 6:30 am I walk out the door go down the stairs and start my car and begin my drive to work.

On the way, I turn on either my latest book on tape or have my i-pod on shuffle and spend half the drive switching songs to try to find the “one song”. 

That’s why this last Thursday it started out as an ordinary routine day. Turn right on Harrison Blvd., Turn left on highway 89 turn right on the Layton exit for highway 193 and then left on University Park Blvd. Monday thru Friday 6:50 am same traffic, it’s become so routine I have started making car buddies with people I see every morning.

As I was merging on 193 I came behind a Geneva Rock truck in the right-hand land and Trim Down Power Up Tish in her Honda Odyssey in the left. I changed lanes and got behind Trim down and Power Up Tish. We got to the first light (there are four on this route) and stopped. The light turned green and Trim Down Power Up Tish goes the same. Exact. Speed. As the Rock truck. There’s no option to pass. This goes all the way to church street. Since at this point I’ve become very acquainted with the back of her Odyssey I see a phone number. Oh no. I thought. This is too easy. Since I could walk to work faster than I’m driving I yell Hey SIRI! Call XXX-XXX-XXXX and the phone rings. (I’ve got Bluetooth.)

An overt perky voice picks up.

TDPU TISH: HELLO! This is Trim Down Power Up TISH! Sqee!

Me: Hello Trim down power up Tish I’m in the car behind you could you speed up just a little bit? I’ve got quite the parade behind me and no one can pass you since you are keeping the same speed as the truck.

TDPU TISH: I’m going the speed limit.

Me: Yeah! For a turtle! Thanks! Bye!

I hang up cause A. Way too much enthusiasm for the morning and B. I know me and if I don’t end it quick it’s gonna get ugly and hello KSL news.

Trim down and power up Tish speeds up and gets in front of the rock truck. It takes everything I have to just stare forward.

So how’s your morning going?