Why yes I am thanks for asking. Being a grown up sucks. You get fat, your hair falls out, and you have all these things that are demanding that you pay them like bills. So rude. I want a refund. Or at least the freedom to have a thirty second dance party at my desk and not hear a mammo princess go "Oh Agnes look at that boy truffle shuffle!"
This is the season in which we are suppose to be grateful and more forgiving to each other and love each other yet when your hand is shoved up a turkey's hind quarters yanking out guts and gizzards your ability to love mankind gets severely tested. However yesterday when I went to Costco I became the most popular person ever! Walking around waiting for my prescription to be filled it seemed as if a spot light had been turned on me! Everyone wanted to know where certain items were. Since I consider myself Costco literate one would be stretching the truth if they called me a Costco expert. That belongs to those who drive mini vans bless their hearts.
Then the truth hit.
I was the loser who forgot to take off his name badge. There goes my Costco popularity. They thought I just worked there. Oh well it was fun while it lasted.
If one is to be grateful can I just say one thing? I'm grateful for that moment when you come home get in your fat pants (don't judge) crawl into bed get yourself all cozy and fall asleep. Oh! The joys of turning on the netflix and finding a show you love but haven't seen in forever (I'm looking at you White Chicks "she's going to have a BF" which so describes my job on so many levels) or my absolutely favorite thing ever and curling up on the couch with a good book and finding out it's a series that's finished! Let me explain I start so many great books find out they are a series but the author is taking their sweet time finishing and I spend months to years anguishing rereading and then oh wait the author dies! I'm looking at you Robert Jordan!
Now to begin my favorite holiday! The only requirement is to eat! Something I'm good at!
Might have to upgrade the fat pants...
No comments:
Post a Comment